The Story of Us

So would you like to hear a slightly embarrassing story? 

My freshman year at JMU I took the 8am Anthropology class in the building right next to my dorm.  I would roll out of bed and often stumble to class still in my pajamas.  The professor was a nice guy who lived within a mile of where I grew up in Charlottesville, and I enjoyed his classes (once I was fully awake that is).  One day, his lecture was about the expectations of men and women and how they differ from culture to culture, and how even in our own culture those roles are changing.  "Today, it is much more common for a woman to put her career first before having a family.  Cara, where do you see yourself in 10 years?"  And without blinking I answered concisely, "With a family."  He stared at me blankly for a second, then moved on to ask another girl, who responded with something about a job or a career I'm sure - which is obviously the response he was looking for.  How silly of me!  In the middle of a lecture about the progression of the 21st century and how great it is for females to be able to join the working class instead of the stay-at-home-and-breed class...and here I am saying my one and only goal for the next 10 years is to do just that.  But you know what?  I've always wanted a family.  Looking into my future I never saw a job or a nice car (maybe I did see a nice house...but only because of my addiction to the home renovation shows on HGTV...) I only ever saw a husband and children.  Probably 3.  And maybe a dog.  And a trampoline.  

On top of this, I have also always wanted to give birth naturally.  I have always felt that this is what my body was designed to do.  Women for, well....ever have been giving birth to children, so if they could do it, why should I rely on a doctor to do it for me?  I imagined an experience that was definitely painful, but also inspiring and empowering.  And you know what...I was right.  My birth experience was just that.

Now, before I bore you with too many words, here's a picture to rest your eyes on:

Day 11: napping

    

I woke up the morning of September 14 thinking I still had about another week or so before James would be joining us.  Yes, it was our actual due date, but I still thought I would feel something leading up to birth, some sort of motion from inside to give me a hint, "hey Mum, I'm thinking of coming out soon."  Instead I started feeling pain in my lower back, just muscle soreness as though I had been hunched over a good book for too long.  I didn't really think anything of it, I just had my normal cup of coffee and took a shower, and tried to sit in positions to stretch out my back (not easy with 9-months worth of baby in your tummy.)  Then, around 10am, with the pain becoming more regular, I began to think that something else might be going on.  Knowing that labor was most likely going to be a long ordeal I simply went to lie down in bed and rest.  I noticed that the pain was focused only in my back and not in my abdomen.  I knew that this most likely meant that the baby had his/her face pointed towards my belly button instead of my spine, which is okay for birth, but as far as positions go it just means an even longer labor with more pain for Mum.  Before long Kiki came in to visit, and I told her that I thought we might actually be meeting our newest family member today.  And then Mom got back from her run, and I told her the same thing.  So the 3 of us camped out in my room for the next hour or so, painting toe nails and watching music videos on youtube and trying to keep me rested and distracted when the pain started to get worse.

Around 11 I called my midwife, Bet, to let her know that I thought I might be in labour, but with contractions still irregular and 7-10 minutes apart she wasn't worried.  She was already scheduled to come visit us at home at 2pm, so we just left it at that.  I then called Toff, who was at the bakery and told him that he might not want to dawdle on the way home.  It was perfect timing, he was just putting the finishing touches on this:

Trip's first Birthday Cake

So Toff got home around one, and Bet arrived with our student midwife, Jess, around 2.  At this point my contractions were getting stronger, but the pain was still only in my back, so it was likely that there was still a long, painful labor ahead of me.  Bet warned us that even though the contractions were getting closer, it could still be up to three days until we were likely to deliver.  She continued with her examination, and finally looked up at me and admitted, "I'm going to take back everything I just said...you are 4cm dilated...we can go to the hospital whenever you like!"  Turns out, between waking up at 7am with mild back pain, to seeing her at 2pm, my body had made it's way through what is often the longest part of labor.  Once you get to 5cm, things really speed up.  (Good work body!)

We waited another half hour or so, then my entourage and I (Toff, Mom & Kiki and a giant car seat) jumped in the car and Toff did his best to get us pulled over on the way to the hospital - no such luck though.  Our friend Tristan was driving his in-labor-wife to the hospital 3 weeks before, and got pulled over on the way.  "It was everything I ever hoped it would be," he told us later.  And while the cops didn't offer to escort him, they did let him go, and he reckons they wouldn't have gone as fast as he wanted to anyhow.  

At one point on our ride Kiki decided she wanted to sing us a song about a baby but didn't think she knew any.  Until, that is, I reminded her of Sir Mix-a-lots "Baby Got Back" which she knows every single word to.  So she sang it and we laughed and I didn't feel any pain at all for a good three minutes.  (And even now, when Trip is crying and Kiki sings that to him...he stops.  Each and every time.)

In the interest of not losing all of my readers because I make them read far too much in one sitting, I'll finish off for now and tell you the rest at a later (or sooner) date.  But hey, at least you already know how this story ends.

Just incase you forgot how the story ends.